The Blind
Man and the Girl
- Karl Hofer (1943)
Why representation of love with a disability matters
Romantic love is an important part of life for most people, and people with
disabilities are no exception. While romantic relationships usually look a
little different for people with disabilities, they are valid and beautiful, and
they deserve representation.
Relationships where either one or both individuals have some sort of disability
battle stigma and misunderstanding on a daily basis. Comments that a disabled
person “must be rich” as an explanation for why an able-bodied person would be
romantically interested in them, or remarks praising a person without
disabilities for being with a disabled person, as if it’s something they settled
for, can be degrading and perpetuate harmful stereotypes (Taylor, 2021a).
Many people with disabilities experience infantilization, or the
characterization of people with physical or mental disabilities as childlike and
lacking romantic or sexual desires. Their partners are often seen as caretakers
and the relationship is viewed as one-sided. In reality, partnerships should
always be equal, and while disabilities may inhibit partners from doing some of
the work that we associate as being traditional, disabled partners can provide
emotional support and complete other tasks to keep the relationship balanced
(Taylor, 2021).
Sex for people with disabilities is often incredibly misunderstood and sorely
underrepresented. Disabilities affect people in many different ways, and for
some, disabilities change the way they engage in sex. Though physical intimacy
for people with disabilities is often not the same as how abled people
experience it, it can still be beautiful and sexy (Taylor, 2021a).
Representation of people with disabilities is lacking in media. A GLAAD study
found that only 3.5% of recurring characters on broadcast TV series in 2021 have
a disability (Where We Are on TV Report, 2021). Portrayals of their romantic
relationships are even less common, and when they are present, they often
continue to perpetuate harmful stereotypes and misconceptions.
For example, “Glee,” a show known for its representations of marginalized groups
and their struggles, featured several characters with disabilities. One of its
core main characters, Artie uses a wheelchair, another character, Becky, has
Down Syndrome and guidance counselor Emma has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. All
of these characters enter into romantic relationships throughout the show. These
portrayals received mixed reviews, with some criticizing the representations for
perpetuating infantilization and others commending the show for taking on
previously taboo topics such as intimacy among disabled people (Levins, 2013).
In other cases, like Netflix’s “Atypical,” which follows its autistic main
character Sam as he navigates life and romantic relationships, the
representation isn’t exactly what people with disabilities hoped for. In the
show, Sam’s autism and the situations that arise because of it often become the
butt of the joke and play into stereotypes and misconceptions about autism and
people on the spectrum. In addition, “Atypical” seemed to make no effort to
include autistic creatives on the project and the actor who plays Sam is not on
the spectrum (Rowe, 2017).
Representations of disability often fall into the trope of a disabled character,
or a character close to them, wishing they didn’t have their disability. Many
shows and movies with physically disabled characters, from “Glee” to “The Theory
of Everything,” include a dream sequence in which the disabled character can
suddenly walk and is much happier because of it. However, the very ability of
these shows to film scenes where their disabled character, played by a
non-disabled actor, starts strolling around is a reflection of the
discrimination that people with disabilities still face as they aren’t hired to
play disabled characters. An estimated 95% of characters with disabilities are
played by non-disabled actors (Visibility of Disability, 2021).
Non-disabled actors playing disabled characters and the lack of disabled
writers, producers and other creatives can contribute heavily to the
misrepresentation of disabilities in media, and it’s far too common. The 2016
film “Me Before You” received criticism for casting a non-disabled actor, Sam
Claflin, in the role of a paralyzed wheelchair user who contemplates suicide as
he feels life is no longer worth living if he has to do it with a disability
(Taylor, 2021b). Not only did the film perpetuate the idea that life is less
valuable for people living with disabilities, but it also fell into the category
of films about disability made without input from disabled people. In 2015,
Eddie Redmayne won an Oscar for his performance as Stephen Hawking, the
real-life physicist who had ALS and used a wheelchair, in “The Theory of
Everything.” Redmayne does not have a physical disability and walked up to the
stage to accept his award, allowing viewers to compartmentalize disabilities
within a semi-fictional story and avoid confronting the reality that people with
disabilities exist outside of their neatly resolved storylines in films and TV
shows (Harris, 2015).
However, films and TV shows are starting to do better. Netflix’s “Sex Education”
features a character named Isaac, who uses a wheelchair, and presents him as a
multifaceted, well fleshed out character with personality traits beyond just
being disabled. The actor who plays Isaac, George Robinson, is disabled, and was
given the opportunity to provide his input to the show’s creators to ensure an
accurate portrayal of disability. The recently released third season of the show
even includes an intimate scene between Isaac and another character, which was
praised for being a beautiful and accurate representation of intimacy for people
with disabilities (Taylor, 2021b).
As representations of people with disabilities become more common, disabled
communities hope that their accuracy will grow, too. By employing people with
disabilities as actors, writers, producers and directors, media portraying
people with disabilities, specifically romance and intimacy for disabled people,
will be able to help in the fight to destigmatize disability rather than
contribute to harmful stereotypes.
Sources:
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Levins, L. (2013). Dancing With Myself: Representations of Disability Within
Glee. Middle Tennessee State University.
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Taylor, A. (2021b, September 20). Sex Education: Isaac actor George Robinson
gets intimate about disability. BBC News.
https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-58623652
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